Be Still and Know...Then and Now

My glasses are broken, my car is in the shop and my DVR is broken! So…….for the next 24 hours I have decided that I am declaring an a moratorium on maturity!   My DVR in done for. My provider is sending us another one, however until then we are forced to watch television in real time! For real! It probably will not get here until Monday or Tuesday. That means we have to endure the WHOLE WEEKEND watching television in real time! What is this 1970! I’m think’n that a broken DVR rates at least an overnight FEDX delivery, cause this is important, right!   And since it went kaput it has not recorded any of my current programming. This in turn has forced me to watch a few shows on the computer. This means that I am forced to watch commercials. It also reminds me how much our internet totally blows as well. Our download speed is akin to something that resembles the speed of a snail. So Now I have to watch commercials, waiting while the show reloads for the millionth time all whi...

I had never had a hip injection before so I was a bit apprehensive going into the procedure. Unless you have nerves of steel, I think most normal folks would experience moments of apprehension at the prospect of any medical procedure that involves long needles. During major surgery you have the benefit of being unconscious, however for this very minor procedure a small local anesthetic was all that was required. I was patient #7. It was like a human cattle call, we were all lined up in a medical assembly line, each partitioned off in our separate little curtained waiting areas with our warmed blankets, hospital gowns, matching disposable shower caps and fuzzy socks with the skid proof tread on the feet. The doctor actually had to help me put on my fuzzy socks as I could not bend over to put them on myself. She had come in to introduce herself. She took pity on me when she noticed that I had only managed to get one sock on. She bent down retrieved the lone sock and put it on for me. ...

You know that point when it is easier to take a second picture that spend thirty minute looking though all your digital files looking for a photo you know you have already taken....yea that moment right now! Moving on!  I am participating in a bible study on Wednesday evening at out church. It's called Experiencing God. I know in my heart that all study of God's Word does not return to us empty, it will return to us with whatever gift, message or direction that God chooses. It is never a waste of time and it is never to be taken lightly.  I will say that with most bible studies I have taken I usually find myself in a situation where the author and I departed on certain theories or even interpretations. That's ok as well. We all come to the study of God's Word on different levels of need. The concept of this bible study is not unfamiliar to me. It starts from a place of recognizing that God in His infinite wisdom is always at work...

Does the sound of the rain comfort you? I was sitting in my chair this morning listening to the rain and wondering. Is there any sound in the world that brings with it a more peaceful feeling? Maybe the train whistle far off in the distance that I just heard comes close. I am not sure why I opened up blogger this morning. The daughter just left for school, which means due to our lack of adequate transportation I am under house arrest until she returns. We make due until we can sort out this latest wrinkle, not having a big ol' pile of money for a third car at our disposal is at times a big pain in my you know what. Had the girlchild heeded our warnings several years ago and set about saving the necessary funds then none of this would be necessary, yet again the sacrifices a parent makes for the needs of a child. The reality, like I was getting out in the rain to drive her to school just so I could have the car.....sooooooo not happening this morning. S...

Ever since I was a little girl I have had a significant fear of conflict. I once witnessed an argument between my parents and my dad left afterwards. I translated that to mean that if you fight with your husband then they walk out on you and never come back. In reality my dad actually did walk out on us. However I feel certain it was not a result of that one argument that I witnessed as a child. It took me many years to make the connection between what I had witnessed as a child and my fear of conflict in all areas of my life. As a grown woman who has successfully maneuvered over thirty plus years of marriage I can state that I still shy away from conflict, but I no longer feel that a marital spat will end my marriage. Regretfully the scars of my experience have translated to a hesitation to enter into situations where I think there may be some conflict involved. My stomach begins to hurt and I have an automatic flight response. I want to avoid any forms of conflict. The other t...

Some days my brain and thought process works just fine, like today. I was able to follow through with several projects and actually get them completed.  Other days, if feels like my brain is stuffed with an enormous wad of hormonally soaked cotton. I teeter on bursting into tears over not being able to remember to remove the dryer lint from the lint trap or resisting the urge to break all my dinner plates by smashing them against the kitchen floor.  Toss into the mix a mouthy teenage daughter and by the end of the day the administration of a medicinal cocktail is a requirement not a luxury! The other side effect of all of this is that my tolerance for complications is almost non existent. Case in point, now that the girlchild had gradated high school the next logical step is collage. However, almost everything about the process of getting her enrolled into college has been an exercise complications, errors and a big fat waste of time and energy. None of wh...

I’ve been thinking about updating my blog for about forever, however the desire, the energy, the actually words to share seemed to disappear. It’s only August and it feels like about ten years has passed. Sometimes things pile up on ya, when life tosses a whole pile of stuff at your door and you sit back and wonder why does life have  to be so hard at times. The reality, my life is no more or less difficult than anyone else's. My mom died in January. It was very unexpected and it was defiantly not the way we expected to begin the new year. My daughter graduated from high school in May, again, I’m not the only mom dealing with shifting roles, growing pains and learning how to parent a child that wants to be a grown-up, but in reality is still a child in my mind. Hormonally, I am on the downward spiral and find that the ebbing of my natural female function to be difficult. The emotional ups and downs are at times very difficult to maneuver through. Focusing on the reality ...