God's Word for Today

Sunday, July 28, 2013

An Internal Dialogue: “No animals (or humans) were harmed in the writing of this post”

It started very early, before I even got out of bed.

My thought life was going places it just did not need to go. As it does from time to time I woke with thoughts of doom and gloom. Thoughts that no mother ever wants to ponder upon. I lay there for several minutes allowing the thoughts to weigh heavy upon me, then I recognized it for what it was.

Away from me Satan, it’s Sunday and I need to get ready for church.

The evil one is persistent.

It was a series of very small things, however it was just enough to shift my mood, my thoughts to a place where they should not have been.

I got myself ready for church, I was ready to go, purse on my shoulder and the Girlchild points to my chin and announces “You have a GIANT white hair right there!”

From the look on my face she then follows with “Well it’s better than waiting to point it out to you at church!”

I concede to her logic and redeposit my purse and other things to the counter and go on a hair plucking mission.

We managed to hit every red light on the way to church, now I am hating street lights and being law abiding.

It continued as we walked across the church parking lot. I notice that one of my friend looks very nice today. Do I complement her? That would be a big no. Internally I think how very coordinated she is today. Her Capri's and strappy sandals match and she even ties it all together with a coordination necklace. Very nice. I am now hating her for being so thoroughly put together and berating myself for my lack of the accessorizing gene.

We get on the elevator and hit the button for the third floor.

The door closed and begins to rise up, ding the door open and I realize that we are on the second floor. The children's floor. An older couple get on. I am guessing that they have dropped their grandchildren off. Now I am irritated that we had to actually stop at the second floor to allow these folks to get on. Now I am hating them and all children too boot!

Finally we get to the right floor.

We walk into the sanctuary and my normal spot on the front row is filled with strange people. Now I am hating all these strangers, and hating myself for being inflexible.

I ease down the isle to an available row about midway back. One of my fellow church members tries to make a joke about joining them in the back. Well I began to hate them for their comment.

I guess by this point my internal thoughts were now seeping out of me like a cloud of toxic waste.

One of me sweet church friends gently leans over and whispers in my ear “Are you alright?”

I guess my cranky was not so internal after all.

I take a deep breath and whisper back that yes, I am alight, I just have my cranky on.

Any woman in my age bracket seems to understand that sometime ya just aren't feeling it.

Well I sat there during worship trying to soak up some good. Trying to allow my surroundings seep into me and wash away all the ill humor.

One of the realities I am certain of is that one of the evil ones favorite places in church.

Oh and all those strangers in the front row….they were baptizing a baby. Double hating myself for hating them…

I would love to share that the light dawned, that the sermon spoke to me, that there was a miraculous internal shift.

The reality is that thankfully I was able to control my tongue and not verbally bite someone head off. I practice the tried and true Thumper philosophy. If you can’t say anything nice don't say anything at all.

Y’all want to know what the sermon was on?????


Y’all I certainly did not deserve to here a word of grace today. I had no love for just about anyone yet God’s Grace was the topic du jour.

So what is my take away?

Having just comprehended the previous sentence and acknowledging how completely accurate it really is.

I did not deserve to here a word of grace. I no not deserve GRACE in any form or fashion. I certainly did not deserve anything with my internal nasty going on.

Yet there it was….GRACE!


I am yelling at me not y’all!

Somebody need to be yelling at me!

Oh that’s right I was at CHURCH hearing a word on Grace.

God disciplines those He loves …or for today places a message of GRACE before the red light, coordinated Capri's and sandals, second floor getter on’ers and baby baptizer hating person like me….

I feel like I need to post an addendum to this post like they do in movie credits.

“No animals (or humans) were harmed in the writing of this post”


It’s been a few hours since I got home from church. I administered a BLT made with thick cut bacon and some good home grown tomatoes with a heaping side of Frito's.

For today I really am thankful for a word on Grace and BLT’s!

I will pray for more control over my internal dialog and I will continue to seek discernment for when the evil one tries to turn my small stumbling blocks into huge boulders.



John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.




Saturday, July 27, 2013

Dragged Kicking and Screaming…

Confession time here!

There are times when I just want to dig a mote and build a huge wall around my house. I want to just shut myself off from the world. The evening news, the things and people you come in contact with on a daily basis, well most of it just hurts my heart.

I want one of those “Hide” buttons like I have on Facebook. There are some things I just don’t want to see, and LOTS of things out there that are just not supposed to be seen. Wouldn’t it be great if there was a real life hide button. Just think of the possibilities…

However living in the real world I know that there is a HUGE difference between the things I should not see and the things I don’t want to see. There are times when I am just like Paul, the very thing I know I should not do is the very things I end up doing. Then the things I know I should do, or the things I know Jesus would do are the very thing I don’t do. Life is so very hard sometimes.

Doing the right thing, or the Jesus things is almost always going to go against what is popular.

So here is my Friday morning story…

At this particular phase of my life there are time when sleep is at times difficult. I had had one of these tossing and turning nights. Normally I am an early riser, most mornings my internal alarm clock will wake me around 6:00 AM. I am OK with that as I get to have my quiet time and ease into my morning. However when I am struggling with sleeping there are times when my body just takes what it needs. Yesterday, I awoke to cabinets banging and coffee pots clanking. I open a sleep encrusted eye to see that it is 8:15. I know the Hub’s is already gone so I know that the offending ruckus is HER! That’s what happens when the last thought you have before finally drifting off to sleep is the vision of the alarm clock glowing 3:45. In any event I hauled my old bones out of bed and follow the smell of coffee. There is the Girlchild dressed and ready to head out the door….at 8:15 in the morning. Imagine my surprise when said Girlchild rarely makes an appearance before 10:30 AM. Reality dawns as she gently in her oh so subtle and slightly sarcastic way remind me that she is going to Six Flags with her youth group.

Now remember I have had less than the required amount of sleep and no coffee so my mental functions were like molasses in January. A small miracle happens and it dawns on me that the Girlchild intentions are to hop in the car thereby leaving me stranded at home all day long. At this moment I am cursing the injustices' of life as well as the reality that we do not have a third vehicle.

In a moment of clarity spurred on by a sip of coffee I quickly change into my crappy studio cloths and rake a brush through my hair and hop in the car, I did make the Girlchild drive though. I nursed my coffee as she drove to the church all the while wishing that a third vehicle would drop from the sky and land in our driveway….it could happen!

We arrive at church and she hops out of the car and barely gives me a second look, yes I did give birth to her and I do love her, but sometime…….did I mention I am sleep deprived….anyway I digress. There really is a positive conclusion to all this so just bare with me.

I sat in my car drinking my coffee watching the kids load on to the busses, it hits me I’m hungry. In the rush to get out the door there had been no time for breakfast. I was also all the way into town so being the good steward that I try to be, and with gas being $3.55 a gallon the idea off driving all the way back home for breakfast and then driving all the way back to the studio, since I was almost there any way….well I just pointed my car in the direction of the nearest Chick-Fil-A.

I ordered myself a chicken biscuit and pulled out a $5.00 bill and drove up to the window. When I got there I automatically just handed the money over to the young woman.

She announced to me “The car in front of you paid for your order!”

God is soooooo gooooood Y’all!

I have struggled for years, yearned to seize the moment, to do exactly what I know in my heart is the right thing to do at the exact right moment. Most times I fail, however at that precise moment with my small little five dollar bill already in my hand I just handed it to the young woman and said “Well, you can apply this to the car behind me.”

She took my money and handed me my breakfast.

Now I know that that is a very small thing.

But my morning had been transformed from being dragged kicking and screaming, that would be mentally kicking and screaming out the door well before I was ready, into being blessed by an random stranger, then also being able to seize the moment and continue to pay it forward and bless someone else.

I pulled my car into a parking spot and enjoyed my chicken biscuit. It was really good y’all. Was it good because chicken biscuits are just delicious, or was it extra specially good because God’s Grace, His unmerited favor had touched my morning. Confession time, my internal thought life going on at that moment, being roused out of bed, having to haul my ungrateful teenager to church, and being hungry on top of it all was NOT a blessing y’all!!!! 

Yet even with all my stinking thinking going on, I received!

My faith in the world, well in the notion that there are others in the world who understand the concept of who Jesus is and how He lived his life was restored. It needed restoring, it needs restoring every day! How else am I going to remember to pay it forward.

I finished my breakfast and then drove over to the pottery studio. My ill mood had disappeared. I had a good day with the clay. It was good y’all.

God is good.

Do I still want one of those Facebook “Hide” buttons? Yup, I think it would come in real handy.

The reality, Jesus is better than any ‘’Hide” button, can I get an AMEN!

So…that’s it!

Happy Saturday Y’all!




Sunday, July 21, 2013

I’ve been thinking….

Which for me can be a bit dangerous.

However with my fluctuating hormonal state I have to take the functional brain activity when I can get it.

The other day at the pottery studio we were talking, that is not unusual, we are always chattering about all sorts of things, however one of our newest Pottery Peep’s commented on a picture I had posted on Facebook of my latest painting. She and I had been friend for years but apparently it had never come up in conversation “I had no idea you were an artist!” she said.

There are things that may be, at times, to personal to share about ones self for fear that you place your heart out there for all the world to see. Plus sometime I just think the whole thing is just not noteworthy enough to bring up in conversation.

Also at the age I am I am finding that I am less and less concerned of what other folks think of me, however I am a bit more sensitive where my creative endeavors are concerned. It is sort of like wanting to please your favorite art teacher. Inherently we all want to be liked on some level.

I have also been thinking on the why or where this sudden onset of creative energy has come from.

I made an impromptu trip to Hobby Lobby and purchased several new blank canvases, some additional paints and other painting paraphernalia simply because I wanted them. There was also an ulterior motive at work as well. I wanted to make sure I had the supplies at hand so that I could paint when ever I wanted to.

So where does all this come from….

I think there are many factors at work here.

The first being maturity. I recognize that it’s not really important what y'all think of what I am working on. I love it when folks like what I am doing, however just finding joy in pursuing something that fulfills me is a good thing.

Second I have no scientific evidence to back this up, but I think the waning hormones, the natural ebbing away of estrogen and progesterone has made some kind of internal shift. I may be loosing hormones by the gallon but my creative energy tank is getting topped off on a regular basis.

Thirdly, there is a HUGE factor of time. When I was younger I was so focused on getting a painting done. I wanted that immediate gratification. Having gone though some of my old canvases and cringing in horror I can now see the error of that line of thinking. Now I am not concerned with getting it done, with starting and finished all in a day or two. Now I am more focused with getting it right, being happy with the end result and enjoying the process.

Working with the clay has further enhanced that notion. There is simply no way to start and finish a vessel all in one day. There are very defined stages in how the process works. One must wait for things to dry, to be fired, to be glazed, the process can not be rushed. It just takes as long as it takes. It is also wrought with human error, mostly mine! I can completely love a vessel only to have the glaze turn out less than desired.

So I am learning that there is value in the process and not just the end result.

I am learning that “learning” has value too!

This flower vase is the perfect example. The first go round the glazing turned out terrible. I was so disappointed. However there are times when re-glazing a second time is the thing to do. Sometime you are just over it and the disappointing whatever it is gets relegate to a dog bowl or door stop, then there are times when you throw caution to the wind and give it another go.

This re-glaze worked very well. I was very pleased with the outcome. The sad thing is that given the fact that it was a re-glaze the chances of trying to hit this mark again are one in a million. However I have thrown a second small flower vase and I am going to attempt to get lightning to strike twice and see if I can achieve the same results again!



Lastly, there is also value in walking away for something for a time. I had stepped way from this painting for a very long time. Several weeks ago I had a surge of energy and found myself in front of this canvas yet again. It just did not seem to be finished to me. Every time I looked at it it just felt incomplete. I would wander up to the studio and dabble on it a bit, haul the painting back down stairs to set it on the mantle to live with it for a few days. That is always the litmus test for me. Once I have lived with it for a few days I usually get the sense if something is finished.

Well, after multiple trips back up and to the isle and then back down to the mantle again over several weeks I have finally achieved a sense of completion.

For now anyway, it is finished.

IMG_0917 - edit

Happy Sunday Y’all


Saturday, July 20, 2013

Knock, Knock

Who’s there….well it’s me!


After a very long break from blogging, well long break for me that is. I have decided that I will try to be a bit more proactive with my blog.

Thanks Dana for the bit of encouragement, it is nice to know one is missed from time to time :)

Sometime ya just don’t have anything ta say…and sometimes ya do…

I have been spending a lot of time working on my pottery and I have started painting again so my time has been a bit divided by my creative pursuits. I am having more fun than should be allowed, however it can be a bit of a downer when the reality of life interrupts the fun. Having to stop and be a mom every now and again can be a real drag…those pesky parental duties such as collage visits and senior portraits.

All I can tell you is that back in the dark ages we did not do things like college visits or senior pictures. We all got the same blue velvet off the shoulder drape and that was the end of it. Now they do multiple changes of clothing, different back drops with props no less, and all this can be yours for the bargain price of wads of cash. The whole process took about an hour plus, between multiple outfit changes at the various different staging areas. I was entertained by just sitting back and watching.

I saw the main man, the BMOC. I actually had to explain to the the girlchild what Big Man on Campus meant. But this young man defiantly fit the description. He was a football player and there was no denying it by his physique. I think the tee shirt he had on may have been spray painted on, it actually had a small rip in the sleeve for effect as if his muscles had actually burst froth from his shirt.

Also when did bra’s become an accessory. There was one girl there who had changed into a short backless dress, it was about two sizes to small, extremely short and like I said backless. I mention that the dress was at least two sizes to small as I could see the small clasp at the back of the dress straining to remain in place, I also notices that the clasp on the back of her bra was likewise straining to remain in place as well. I had this mental image of what would happen in the event that both the clasps were to give way…not a good thing.

Then there was the young woman who was trying her best to dress like a young man, complete with baggy gym shorts, oversized white tee shirt that hung to her knees unlaced converse tennis shoes and baseball cap on backwards. What’s up with that…I had an idea but it was an unkind thought so I will keep it to myself.

A good time was had by all…

Well I think that is enough for one lazy morning that has suddenly morphed into afternoon. The Hubs just left to go help a friend and I am on my own. I have multiple stimulating household chores to do and grocery shopping to get done  so I thought I would prolong the laziness with a visit to the blogosphere.


Well not to bad for my first foray back after a break.


I’m on my laptop or I would post a picture of my latest painting and pottery but I don’t keep picture on this computer…





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