In an effort to be systematic in laying out the best possible case for my winning the Ugliest Mug Contest I have several factors that, once you read, I feel certian will persuade you that I do have the ugliest mug.
1. I’m Hormonal and I think I deserve to win! (please pay careful attention to the fact that I have my sweater zipped all the way up to spare you all the truly frightening images of my neck, this compassionate gesture on my part should also be considered as you are casting your votes as well!)
3. I’m Hormonal and I need this validation to feel like a worthy human being.
4. My mug also speaks a foreign language.
I am not sure what it is saying as I do not speak Swedish but it proudly proclaims something of which I can not understand!
5. My mug has these lovely moose tracks down the handle of the mug.
6. My mug not only has one Moose on it, it has an entire moose family.
Here is Dad on the one side
And Mom and Baby moose on the other side.
7. My mug was in fact gift from my husband.
He took great care in selecting just the right memento to bring back to me from Sweden (countless second in the airport gift shop prior to boarding the plane to be sure) to add to my collection of travel mugs.
8. This mug no doubt traveled the furthest as Sweden is 4580.8 miles away from my home.
10. I’m hormonal and I deserve to win and did I mention I’m hormonal and I deserve to win!
11. Lastly and most importantly, and this one I feel in all honesty is critical to the very nature of the "Ugly Mug Contest" ideals is the fact that I actually owned my ugly mug at the time of the contest.
I did not need to do an exhaustive search of the local goodwill or thrift shop. I was willing to throw open the cabinet doors and allow complete and total unhindered access to the hidden recesses of my kitchen cabinets.
Yes! I own an ugly mug and I am proud to show it off.
I even drink out of it from time to time so with won't feel slighted or have an inferiority complex about being ugly.
So there you have it eleven compelling, pleading, begging, forceful, persuasive and undeniable reason why I feel I should win this contest.
You may now stop what you are doing and immediately go over to 2nd Cup of Coffee and vote for me.